Im sitting here thinking about forgiveness along with other random thoughts that are related, and yet unrelated; and it occurred to me, as the Holy Spirit touched some wounds that I didnt know hadnt healed

– wounds that still bled

– wounds that I didnt realize existed because of the hardened scab that covered over them…

As I was sitting here thinking about, and contemplating, forgiveness; and as I was being shown the cold calloused heart, and the manifestation of it in one’s life . I was sitting here thinking about forgiveness and for a second I saw a lesson in agriculture – the breaking up of fallowed ground.

… and it occurred to me that the ground of our heart (especially women) become hardened, cold, calloused, when we dont forgive those who have hurt us in the past – deep hurts that, when we bury them, it is not that we have let go of them or forgiven those that hurt us…

… when we bury our hurts in our hearts, instead what happens is that we are hardening our hearts.

So now imagine this.

You are hurt on one issue, and instead of dealing with that hurt you bury it…

Your heart is hardening, but not to the point where it cant be healed.

BUT after years of being hurt deeply by various ones, and you press your way through it, and bury it in the name of letting it go; instead of dealing with it like Matthew tells us to in chapter 5, then what happens is that as people begin to see our strength, and as people begin to call us strong, is it really strength that they are looking at, or are they seeing a hardening of the heart?

Iyanla Vanzant wrote a book years ago called Yesterday, I Cried. (A very powerful book about letting go of the pain and about the power of shedding tears.) Tonight I thought about her as I penned the words

Today, I Bled – not cried, but bled.

Today, the Holy Spirit took me into the examination room and showed me a wound that had never healed.

Some wounds, some breakages, if they do not heal correctly, have to be rebroken in order to be reset so that they can heal properly.

Today, I bled.

Today an area of brokeness was exposed to me.

Today I bled.

Today, I had to bleed in order to see that there was an area of unforgiveness that I covered over.

An area that I was not aware of because I thought I forgave, but the truth revealed (showed) that I buried it instead of releasing it.

Therefore, when the same scenario played out again today, as I bit my tongue to not respond, and as I gripped my spirit to not react, and as I bent over from the pain of a wound reopened, an area that bled because it needed to be dealt with and released; an area that is still very sore, but because I am aware of it now, I can now submit to getting it treated by Jehovah Rapha, the great healer.

Today as I was being shown the blood oozing from the open wound that was retouched…

Today i also saw that when you come across hardened ground, not to judge it.

A lot of times we judge hardened ground calling it wicked, evil, demonic.

Today I was shown that grounds (hearts) have becomed hardened because of deep hurts that were not tended to.

Today I was shown and allowed to understand my own areas of fallowness that I didnt realize existed so that I could help others in their areas.

(Remember that we cannot help another until we can first help ourselves.)

It is really easy to break up the concrete of ones heart. You use the tool forgiveness like a Jack hammer to break up fallow ground, and that is the purpose of my writing all of this. To let you know of the importance of forgiveness.

We hear all of that great stuff about how when we forgive others it is not for them but it is for us. Yea that sounds good. Yea that makes sense. But what does it really mean ?

Apply it.

I can apply it.

If I dont forgive you. If I say that I wont forget. If I say that I will not ever let another get so close to me again. I am locking up my heart.

Ok one lock is not always bad. But what if I lock up my heart for this reason, and then I lock up my heart for that reason, and then I lock up my heart for yet another reason and years go by and more and more reasons are occurring in which I am locking up my heart…. well, what has happened is that my heart has begun to harden.

Hardening of the heart is not good.

Hardening of a vital organ is called schlerosis.

Many have heard of that in terms of the liver when it comes to people who are alcoholics.

Alcohol is yet another way that one buries issues that are painful for them. Drugs is another way that people bury their issues. Unforgiveness is yet another way that people bury their issues. Hardening of the heart will kill you as will a hardening of any major organ of the body.

This is for women….

are you hardening your heart because of the insensitivity of the man in your life. Dont do it. Dont harden your heart. It will kill you, and it could kill your relationship. Listen to me on this.

So much is being poured into me to write on, to clarify, to expose. So much is being poured into me on this that was taught to me today on forgiveness, and on hardened grounds.

But right now I am distracted and am having a hard time focusing on this to finish writing and sharing all that was given to me.

I am distracted because of a conversation that I had with a gentleman this evening about 30 minutes ago. A conversation that was divinely ordained.

I am too excited because as God was initially dealing with me in this one area, then almost instantly I was taken to another area of ministry…

and I am too excited to be able to talk to another who loves God, whom is from my hometown (Chicago), who knew my parents, and who can hear me.

I am too excited about the opportunity to speak upon and share with another what I was privileged to learn about our DNA.

I am too excited…

… also my atmosphere is changing so I need to follow the leading and move as I am being directed to move which means that though this area is not complete…

… for those who was following it, stay where you are and allow the Holy Spirit to continue to minister healing to you.

Be blessed.