It’s crazy how I am a writer and I write what I hear so I don’t feel no type of way about it because its not mine. It’s what I hear and many times I am checking myself through the writing to make sure my own emotions (feelings ) don’t get in the way.

But then there comes a time when Father says

Do this.
Say that.
Ask

And oowee…
Let the struggle begin

I am both sons that Jesus spoke of whom the Father said go and work.

I am that son that says yea sure I’ll go. Send me. But then I beat around the bush and procrastinate depending on what I’m sent to do.

(I hate cleaning bathroom toilets, but there is some stuff that I am asked to do or say that I’d rather clean a whole bathroom first lol ijs)

But I am also that son that says no I’m not going and then will feel guilty for not going and I’ll get up and go do or say

It’s that moment where I overcome a fear and just do it because the Holy Spirit wore me out with…

“That’s not what I told you to do. I didn’t say do it like that. Oh really so that’s what we are doing now Jonah. Really?! You seriously think you are about to ignore me?! Really?! Im gonna sit right here and wait for you to come to your senses. Let me know when you get tired of circling around the mountain and you are ready to do what I told you to do a week ago…”

Me, a week later, feeling sore and beat up, quickly doing what I was told to do the first time. 🏃🏃🏃

Jonah is not my friend.
I really need to not associate with him.
Ugh.

(For those who are new to my writings and don’t understand my writing style, I’m referring to the story Jonah in the Bible and how God gave him instructions to do and speak and he called himself running from his assignment.

You cannot run from GOD.)

I did what I was supposed to…
I climbed the mountain
But it was after I wasted time and energy trying to go around the mountain.

Me: (to my tutor) “I did it.”